Is Having A Roommate Worth It?

Owned or rented, housing is a substantial outlay of money. And it’s just an initial cost. You’ll also pay utilities, electricity, and water at the very least. Others that come to mind are sewer, gas, trash…possibly taxes, and homeowner association fees. There might not be that many, or there could be more. If you rent, anything your landlord has to pay, divvied between tenants, will be incorporated into your lease payment. When confronted with all the expenses, a lot of people look for a way to alleviate them and wonder if it would be worth having a roommate. Many of them find it is.

Is having a roommate worth it? The answer is yes. If you find the right person. There are frugal reasons to have a roommate. The obvious one is that you can cut expenses and save money. That’s true, of course, but frugal living is not about saving money just for the sake of saving. The greater reason is that a frugal person wants their money to do more for them. Frugal living is about covering today’s costs and preparing for the future. Your future probably includes some goals and some dreams you’d like to make a reality. That takes money. The more of your money you keep to put toward those goals, the more likely you are to achieve them. A good roommate can be an asset in doing that.

Is having a roommate worth it

A good roommate will help with rent and utilities. You need to decide what qualities you’re looking for in addition to helping with those expenses. Of course, there will need to be some disclosure on all sides. And to protect yourself, you’ll probably want to make it contractual (legal).

Finding a good roommate is a process. The first step is understanding your reasons for wanting one.

It takes both a financial commitment and a personal relationship to make having a roommate worth it.

Pros And Cons Of Having A Roommate

Having a roommate can be a great blessing, and on the other hand, it can be a significant pain in the butt. Your job is to find someone you can easily live with. It would be best to decide what you are looking for in a roommate and find a good one.

Qualities of a good roommate are basic pay their share of rent and utilities, cleaning up after themselves, and respecting your privacy.

Pros Of Having A Roommate

Opportunity to make new friends and improved social life
More affordable than living alone
More housing options are often available
A better social life

Cons Of Having A Roommate

Adjusting to different levels of tidiness
Living with a different personality
Different sleeping schedules
Different noise levels
Less privacy

More pros and cons of having a roommate.

Why Are You Looking For a Roommate

Maybe you’re in a financial bind, and all you really want is someone to help with expenses. Another take on this is that you’d like to live in a place more upscale, but doing that by yourself would put you in a financial bind. Or, sometimes, people just have too much house; they don’t want to “rattle around” in it by themselves. These are reasons that would make having a roommate worth it. (BTW: I’ll occasionally use the term “housemate”. The meaning is essentially the same as “roommate”.)

Here’s an example: About thirty years ago, I got to know a couple of women who were housemates. They were both widows in their early 70s. Each had owned her own home and had a comfortable life. As they got older, keeping up with all the physical work involved in owning a house and property had become more than either of them wanted to deal with. Even though neither one felt old, one was considering drastic downsizing. The other had investigated moving to a senior living complex.

These women didn’t know each other, but they had a mutual friend. (This friend was my aunt.) My aunt introduced them to each other and began to arrange a series of luncheons and outings for the three of them. She, also, encouraged them to vent. (She had an ulterior motive…) Eventually, she brought up an idea. She thought the two of them should sell their large houses and buy a modest one to share.

It took about a year for the two to warm to my aunt’s idea (as well as become a bit more tired of taking care of everything on their own), but they did sell their places after they found a nice house that fit their purpose. That house was laid out perfectly. On either side of a common area consisting of a living room, eat-in kitchen, and laundry room there were wings with two bedrooms and a bath in each. One used her “extra” bedrooms as an office. (She was an author.) The other kept hers as a guest/sitting room. The place also had a nice yard that wasn’t too big. The women lived in that house for ten years. At first, one did most of the inside work in the common areas. The other was sort of a groundskeeper… They each took care of their private rooms. From the beginning of their tenure, they split expenses like utilities and property taxes. Later, they split the costs of help.

Since cooking and food are generally important considerations when it comes to being roommate. I have to tell you, even though I joined these ladies for lunch or dinner at their place a few times while visiting my aunt, I don’t think it was much of an issue for them. They seemed to share refrigerator space for a few things and had a stash of snacks, but I think they mostly ate out. I do know they had one rule: Who ever emptied the coffeepot was supposed to set it up to make a fresh one.

My aunt maintained her friendship with them of course. She told me that, eventually, one of the women developed severe dementia and went to a nursing home. Sometime after that, the other woman did move into a senior living apartment complex. (The house they shared was sold and the proceeds split.)

The decision those two women made was very frugal even though it wasn’t necessarily inexpensive. My aunt told me they took out a mortgage to buy the new house but paid it off (as intended) when their old properties sold. That was frugal. Sharing the regular expenses was also frugal. And I’m sure they profited when the house they shared sold. Above all, they were able to enjoy being “young” for quite a few more years. (They made a dream come true. That was a frugal success. In addition, bonds of friendship were formed. Even if it isn’t monetary, that’s something of value and value is what being frugal is all about.) I’m including their story because I want you to understand that frugal living doesn’t have to be a response to a financial disaster. It can be a way to maintain or extend a pleasant lifestyle. And perhaps not just lifestyle, but a life. According to my aunt, one day, one of those women kept hearing the other’s phone ring, but she didn’t hear any conversation. After a while, she peeked in the other’s room. Her roommate was collapsed on the floor, unconscious. Needless to say, an ambulance was called. The unconscious woman spent a couple of days recovering in a hospital before life resumed as normal. In this case, I’d say having a roommate was quite worth it.

Lastly, and this is not least, taking on a roommate could be a money-making move. You might want roommates, not because you need anything from them per say, but because you have a place you can afford on your own and want to make some extra cash. That sort of turns having a roommate (or more than one) into a side gig, doesn’t it?

It’s a really good idea to understand your motivation for getting a roommate. Keep it in mind when you start looking for one. It will help you recognize suitable prospects.

What Are You Looking for In a Roommate

Your perspective roommate

Just as you may be looking for a roommate to live with you, there are a lot of people hoping to be taken on as a roommate. They may be students, separated, divorced, widowed, or people who need to start over. Like you, each will have his own reasons. What you have to remember is that when you take on a roommate, you’ll be bringing a person into your life. A roommate isn’t a bank account. You won’t be able to just take money from him. You’ll have a relationship of some kind.

Of course, you want your roommate to be financially responsible. In addition to that, compatibility and respect are important issues. Those are qualities you’ll be looking for. And, even if they haven’t thought it through, your prospective roommates will be looking for them from you. Often, it’s the developing relationship (friendship) that makes having a roommate worth it. (Note: In other articles I’ve talked about it being frugal to about value and conserve resources. Money, time, and health are among them. If you think about it, friendship should also be considered a resource. The account above about the one woman saving the other’s life is a validation of that.)

Let’s look a few circumstances that can influence your search for a roommate:

Maybe you’re a college student carrying a heavy load of hours. You attend classes during the day and you use most evening and weekend hours for study. Between scholarships and grants you have enough money to get by—barely. You’d like to free up some cash for the few occasions you can take a little time off, but you can’t work and get your studying done. You need a roommate who respects your that time. You sure don’t want a party animal. But could you handle the TV or some music (not too loud) if your roommate is in the house? Or, do you need someone who’s gone most of the time and only wants a decent place to sleep?

Maybe you’re a single mom with a couple of kids. You work 9 to 5, Monday to Friday. On those days, you’re out of the house by 8:15 in the morning. You’ll have been up awhile; the kids are dressed and you’ll drop them off at daycare on your way into work. Maybe you want a roommate who not only helps with the rent and utilities, but also fixes dinner a couple of times a week. Oh! and I haven’t yet mentioned your place only has one bathroom. You sure don’t want someone whose work schedule is the same as yours. Someone who leaves a warm casserole in the oven on their way out for an evening shift would be great.

This one is short. No matter how funny it sounds, I need a roommate that’s cat compatible because I have a cat. She doesn’t relate well to dogs. You have a Rottweiler. I need to cross you off my list of possible roommates. That is, unless you want to get rid of the dog? And if you’re willing to do that, I’m not sure that would keep you on the list either. I’d be questioning your loyalty and compassion.

I could give you a dozen vignettes, and you can probably come up with quite a few yourself, but I think you get the idea: Compatibility and respect are important… That takes on even greater significance when you consider your roommate will spend at least some time in your home, with your stuff, when you’re not there. You should add being trustworthy to the list of qualities you’re looking for in a roommate.

Finding Perspective Roommates

You may want some help finding someone compatible, someone who could make having a roommate worth it.

Ask friends

A friend may know someone who’s looking for a roommate. (This is true whether you want someone to move in with you or you’re trying to find someone who will let you share their place.) Friends can be a resource, but you have to treat a friend of a friend as you would any other applicant. And, as hard as it may be, you need to treat your friends that way too. It’s unfortunate, but some great friendships fall apart over assumptions and misunderstandings when people move in together. (I mean, you thought the sweaty workout made him smell. Who knew your tennis buddy only showered once a week?)

Check with your church (or place of worship)

Often, there’s someone (frequently, the church secretary) who knows a lot about what’s going on, about who needs what. With as much detail as possible, give this person an idea of you want in a roommate and ask if they know anyone who might be interested. They may not be free to give you a name, but ask if they will share your info… An interested party may call you later.

Check the newspaper

Most newspaper include notices for people looking for roommates in the “Personal” section. (You could even place a notice.)

Processing Possible Roommates

Application: Have all potential roommates complete an application. This should give you information you need to make an informed decision. The application should include present and prior addresses, state of employment, and personal references. (Note: Some office supply stores have packets with reproducible forms you can use for this. Also, you can find downloadable roommate application forms on the internet. Just be aware, many sites give the impression they’re free… Well, many are free to fill out, but there’ll be a charge for downloading.)

Credit Check: You want your roommate to have the financial resources to pay their part of the rent and other expenses. You also want them to have a history of paying their bills on time. (Believe me there is a difference between the two.) The application process needs to include a current credit check. Again, there are internet sites that provide this service, and, again, sometimes they charge for it, so have your prospective tenet provide a current one. You’ll want to check this document carefully to make sure the personal information (like middle initial, or address, or…) conforms with what’s on their application. View any inconsistences with concern. If you don’t decide to decline the application, make sure the differences are reconciled to your satisfaction. (BTW: It’s not unheard of to request a background check too.)

Verify employment: Since it’s important to have a roommate who can pay their share of expenses, you’ll want to verify that they’re currently employed—and likely to remain so. (Usually, that last bit of information is hard to get out an employer. It’s conjecture and can have legal ramifications, but it’s really hard for most people to pay bills if they’re between jobs.)

Personal references: The roommate application form should ask for personal references, 3 is an average number to have. If you’re the person applying, try to pick people who see or interact with you in a variety of situations—a good friend, a coworker, a pastor or other advisor… You want people who can vouch for your character under different sets of circumstances. On that note, if you’re soliciting a roommate, you might want to keep in mind a couple of people who can affirm your decency and reliability; some of your applicants might be wondering if having a roommate is worth it.

Since there is a strong, personal aspect to being roommates, spend some time getting to know the people who apply to be yours. You can do this through a couple of interviews.

The first interview: Most people assume they will interview perspective roommates on an individual basis. Gather facts from the paperwork (application) and through conversation. You’re on the lookout for conflicting information and reasons not to accept someone as a roommate. This isn’t the time to make a solid decision, but begin to weed out unfavorable (incompatible) prospects.

If you haven’t done so already, the first interview is a good time to let applicants in on what you expect of them. They need to know how much they should expect to pay in rent and utilities. If it’s likely there’ll be conditions under which this figure will vary, they need to know that too. (I had a friend who didn’t know the guy he moved in with had his electricity on an eleven-month fixed rate plan. In the twelfth month the plan required that the consumer to either make up any deficit or get a refund. The request for half the money needed in the twelfth month was an unpleasant surprise.)

Be honest. Don’t use vagaries, untruths, or little white lies when it comes to expenses.

The same is true about chores. Tell your applicants exactly what you expect of them. You should have a list of house rules on cleaning up after yourself, sharing food, the volume on all music, television, and electronics, etc. (If you and your roommate become friends, it’s possible the rules could be relaxed.)

These first interviews will end either with some variation of “I’m not interested,” or “I get back with you soon.” (After they’ve heard your expectations, some of the applicants may withdraw.)

Later, follow up on the accuracy of the paperwork from the applicants you’re still interested in and talk to their references. (You’re still looking for reasons to disqualify them.) Out of the people you’ve looked into, Narrow your choices to two or three. Set up second interviews with these and inform the others that they’re no longer being considered.

The second interview: Now, you’re looking for a reason to accept one of the applicants as a roommate (but you still want to be concerned if you’re presented with questionable information.) You might want this second interview to be more casual.

Ask some leading questions, and give the applicant a chance to talk openly and freely. Ask questions that allow the other person to talk about themselves, their likes, dislikes, hobbies… Ask about their present living situation. Why are they looking for a roommate? If they’ve had roommate(s) before, how would they qualify the experience. Also, you put out a list of expectations at the first interview, now encourage them to talk about theirs. It will be important to them to have their needs and desires respected. And you’ll want to be sure the two set are compatible.

The more a person gets to talk, the more you will get to know them. Make sure they do the majority of the talking. Your job is to listen. Give the applicant the opportunity to give you information. Don’t interrupt and don’t offer any judgement. However, if you’re asking open ended questions and they’re reluctant to talk or try skirt the issue, there is a possibility they’re hiding something. (At the very least, you’ve made them uncomfortable.) It may be that they’re shy, but go with your instincts about bringing them into your household.

As you finish the second set of interviews, let each applicant know you’ll get back to them. Spend some time contemplating who’s the best fit for you. Let of the other(s) know you decided on someone else. Do this courteously, in case you have reason to reconsider (i.e. your first pick backs out), and set up a time to sign a roommate agreement/lease with the applicant of your choice.

Put it in writing: The days of making an agreement with a handshake even about simple things are long gone. And, having someone move in with you isn’t really that simple. I mean, this whole post has been about the need to have a clear statement about responsibilities—financial and domestic. You and your soon-to-be roommate need to put your agreement writing. Again, you may be able to find a form at an office supply store or online, or you could write your own. I found a really good example of a Roommate Agreement online at Moving.com. Take a look at it: You could design something similar to meet your needs.

Note: A Roommate Agreement is not the same as a lease. If you’re a renter and want to take on a roommate for any reason, by law, your management company or landlord needs to be informed and agree. They may even rewrite the lease so that your roommate is obligated to the landlord for their portion of the rent and other charges included in the lease. (That would take some pressure off of you.)

Even if your lease is rewritten, you’re still bringing a new person into your home. It would be smart to have a signed Roommate Agreement as a measure for compatible living. (To give your agreement a little more authority, you might want to get it notarized.)

Conclusion

Is having a roommate worth it? Yes, when you find the right person having a roommate is worth it. Both of you must be willing to accommodate the other’s needs. I’ve given you a few scenarios that should inspire you to think about what you’re looking for in a roommate. Money will definitely be a consideration, but there is also the question of a relationship. You want to find one that is compatible, someone who’ll be a friend.

I’ve provided a list of actions you should take as you go through the process of taking on a roommate. It covers everything from considering why you want/need a roommate to making sure it’s legal.

As I’ve said, having a roommate isn’t only about money, but the ease that comes from a roommate’s contribution to your economy can make it easier for you to meet your financial goals—cover your needs and maybe more. That should give you some peace of mind, and peace of mind is a major objective of frugal living. That means having a good roommate is worth it.